Memories

Over the last 3 years I have been posting on Mom's caring bridge site. It was my outlet. It's where I kept up with what was going on and chronicled everything going on in our lives basically. But now that that avenue has passed, I want to write somewhere else. I am going to attempt to pick back up the ole blog. I want to remember the funny things my kids say and do. I want to document life. As we have learned recently, life is short. This woman meant the world to me. She was my rock, my leaning post on the good and bad days. I told her everything.

I've spent the last 3 years focusing on what needed to be done for her. And I would do it all over again for her. Just to feel her cheek one more time. 

But- alas- she's gone on to better things. And I'm left with just pictures. And memories. But those memories are oh so sweet! I think we have taken like a hundred selfies and bed selfies over the last months! I never missed an opportunity to crawl up in the bed with her or take a selfie! 

Even on the very day she spread her wings and flew home to her perfect body- I was camera happy while I enjoyed our final moments. 

She was amazing. She loved me, and she loved her girls. And we loved her. 

The girls have been very confused. Brenna did a lot of crying. Macie is just mad. She says frequently "I don't want MeMawMom to go to heaven!" It breaks my heart. A few memories from this week that I want to remember.... 

*When the girls got to Moms house last Wednesday, I had her clothes laid out on the bed. I told the girls that I was taking those clothes for MeMawMom to wear. Macie tilted her head and asked "Are you going to drive them ALL the way to heaven?" :)

*i asked Brenna if she understood that MeMawMoms body was in the casket but not her spirit. She said she understood that. I asked if she knew what a spirit was, she said "yes mom! It's like a ghost. But it's nice!" 

*Brenna told everyone on her Sunday School that when you die, your spirit, your heart, and your brain goes to heaven. 

*macie carries around the funeral program with moms picture on it non stop. It melts me and breaks my heart at the same time. 

* last night, Brenna said "Life is just hard without MeMawMom." 

So- in short, these are some things I want to remember. :) my Mama was the best. And I'm lucky that she was mine for 35 wonderful years.